The Inside Story

Yo...Waddup people? How you doin? Been long eh? Well...I've been busy...I'm not jobless like you people, I got work to do and billions to earn. Hey now, I was kidding. Not about you being jobless of-course (you wouldn't argue now, would you?) but about me earning billions :P. Come to think of it, been an year since I last posted here. Its reeking so much you could fart to make it smell better :P. Much has passed though, but lets just talk about whats been recently happening and whats gonna happen.



Lets start with COMMONWEALTH GAMES! Just 44 days left...Wow...this is gonna be something big for Delhi, even for India! I'm really hopeful even though theres so much ambiguity surrounding it all. First of all for the media, you are not as bad as everyone said you are, you are much, MUCH WORSE! I mean...what are they doing? Trying to sabotage the games? Each and every issue not even having the minutest relevance to the games would be highlighted to generate negative publicity in the name of public awareness! 'Girl murdered 3kms from Games Village, indicates lack of security', 'Light Rainfall causes heavy traffic, Is Delhi ready?' I think my Grandma winning the Malaysian Grand Prix is more believable then these media allegations. I'd urge everyone to not care for what the media thinks, they scarcely do it anyway.




Also, many athletes have been pulling out of the Games, mostly due to security concerns. Unbelievable really, because Delhi is going to be a fortress during the Games. Being a Delhiite, you can tell that the preparations are in place already. They have started frisking each and every person on metro stations again and the Police forces have never been so visible before with patrols and barricades in each and every corner of the city. Even the forces from the borders are being withdrawn to beef up the security. So anyone having security concerns, can go jack off to their own genitals! Especially Australian ex-swimmer Dawn Fraser, who recently advised Australian athletes to boycott the Games because of apparent lack of security. Shes talking big for someone who hasn't even had a look at the preparations. Doesn't make for a pretty picture...But we'd all love to 'hang' her anyway...Eh? :P
Anyway, with re-assurances from Sonia Gandhi and Manmohan Singh that action will be taken against the corruption charges after the Games, it's time to move on. All we can do is just hope preparations go on well and the Games are a huge Success. I can't even fathom the splendid impact it will have on the Economy of the country. Best of wishes to all my friends who cleared interviews to be Volunteers to the athletes during the games. Especially the male ones who are gonna be assistants to the female athletes :P.



Moving on though, a lot has been happening in cricket too. Seriously, what was Randiv thinking? Denying Sehwag a century? Maybe they don't take us seriously when we say that cricket is our religion. Sehwag undeniably is a demi-god now :P. Ofcourse it was gonna be a huge controversy (courtesy our hugely celebrated media :P :|) and ofcourse he was gonna face some punishment (courtesy the muscle flexing by our Cricket Board :P). But I hope it does not ruin the unity between SLC and BCCI and the rest of the sub-continent, or the Australian and English Boards would be quick to widen the slightest crack.
There has also been much deliberation about Yuvraj's form and whether he deserves a place in the test side. I even see the fans making fun at his expense. A little hypocritical, don't you think? I mean if you can tell yourself that Yuvraj was not your 'favoritest' person in the whole world when he literally buried Andrew Flintoff and his ego when he hit Broad for half a dozen sixes all over the park, If you can say that you were not proud of being a cricket fan then, then go ahead, atleast from me you have an official license to go and Nuke him. If not, SHUT UP! Coz I'm not fluent in Idiot. Do you know how many times he has been out with injury during the past one year? Instead of backing him up, what do the selectors do? They drop him. We don't need a Shane Bond or Andrew Flintoff in our team, both players missing out on great careers due to lack of support from their boards due to frequent injury problems. Yuvraj deserves a place in every Indian side as of now. He deserves it more than any of the other youngsters.
What becomes off him when he is fully fit remains to be seen.



What else? Hey..I saw this movie recently, 8 seconds. It is based on the true story of late bull rider Lane Frost. Nice movie (The title of the post is a quote from the movie). Also do check out this movie called The Color Purple. It's really an old one directed by Steven Spielberg and also stars Oprah Winfrey. The theme of the movie deals with the condition of black women in early 20th century. Only the third movie after Titanic and Swades that made me a teeny-weeny bit senti, so I'd suggest the ladies that they keep their tissues handy :P.

Wow, has this been a long post? I didn't really notice and don't you dare blame me! I'm writing after such a long gap! And anyway My Mums been calling me for sometime now, I'd better bounce and check whats up. OK, this is me Signing off, I'm Kunwar Krishna Khurana and I approve this post :D.

PS-I hope Ray William Johnson doesn't sue me for the ending :P.

Top 10 Reasons/Events my childhood was hilariously loserish...

1)Till age 12, I was so tiny that I had to literally climb on to the backseat of a two-wheeler.

2)I loved eating Mango duet, just coz I thought it was Mango 'Dude' and not Mango duet.

3)On my very first day training at Hari Nagar Sports Complex, my balls got busted two times and I did not even know what an L-guard was, forget wearing it.

4)On the very same day, in an attempt to make a catch look dramatic, I dived for it and rolled a couple of times. When I got up I was on the other side of the boundary rope.

5)I used to play games like KhoKho, Langdi Tang, Kabaddi during my summer holidays with girls, their aunties and a couple of guyz, who are popularly established as gays today. Thankfully, I was rescued by cricket in time, to have that company any effect on me.

6)Since my childhood, I have this really huge phobia of only one thing, Lizzards. Although the fear has subsided over the years, I jumped like a clown yesterday when a lizzard passed over my foot.

7)While practice one day, I bumped my knee into this sharp stone that was lying on the field. It was a pretty serious injury which resulted in nine stitches and a loose plaster. When I was being carried home, I was crying not because it hurt too much, but coz I was thinking what possible explanation will I give to my father?

8)Jugal Hansraj, used to be my favourite actor. WHY GOD WHYY?


9)I believed my Pop could do magic. Everynight after dinner, he took out a Frooti out of the Refrigerator, spoke some Magic words and whoosh it was in his hands. When he was out of stock, he just said that it was the day for devils and he was forbidden to do magic.

10)I had some strange impression that my father worked for the CID. And my friends blindly believed that shit. In 3rd standard, I asked him about it and to his wide displeasure, was disappointed to know that he just run a finance company.

The Different Sentiments...

1)I am not amused, I am sitting in the institute and Dhruv, after provoking me and receiving a rather insulting reply, has reverted to high degree profanities for me. His female friends are all ears for it, and I'm staring and smiling at Rahul. I'm rather helpless, coz every inch of my body is itching to get up and punch him hard, what I usually do, but I don't want my promise to my mother to be shortlived. I don't care for the Teacher much. I do not want to fuel a fight by speaking up, but Dhruv is already telling me that he'd teach me some lesson during the recess. Rahul tells him to stop or he'll be stretched out at the back of his car when the class ends. He has stopped and I'm to concentrate on the board.

2)I am rather surprised, but not pleasantly. I was conversing with my cousin, 3 years younger than me and was commenting on the group of girls she hung out with. I had heard a lot of tasteless murmur about those girls and I tried to warn my Aunt as I did not want her to fall in the same category. The conversation suddenly shifted to my class 12th board marks and she, obviously irritated, told me that the aggregate I had secured did not have great value and I'd hardly be able to get admission in a good DU college. If I say that I'm not shocked and sad, then I'd be lying. The girl had always respected me and she had made an attempt to speak it in such a way, that would insult and upset me. Well kids do grow up enough to shoot back at you someday. It was my turn to speak and I first made a very sarcastic and rude remark that nobody among her paternal or maternal relatives would ever have managed to boast of such a percentage (Obviously I made it sound really insulting in Hindi.) Then I asked her if her percentage bordered more on the thirties or the forties last semester. Then I slammed the door and walked out of the house, My Aunt calling after me all the while...

3)I am shivering in the heat, I just avoided an accident man....The signals were all screwed, from Rajouri to Tilak Ngr metro station, showing the red and blinking green and yellow signals at the same time. The traffic had gone haywire. I was taking a left turn when a car rushed by at high speed just in front of me and I had to hit the brakes hard. I avoided accident with the car but I heard a screeching sound and looked left and saw a blueline coming at some speed 10 mtrs away. Paralysed I just kept looking, not able to do anything but that. I wasn't even wearing a helmet. The blueline stopped about a feet away from me. It took my heart 10 seconds to start beating again. It would sound corny but it was the nearest death experience I'd had.
I raced the bike and drove away....This incident really did scare the shit out of me. I vow to wear a helmet from now onwards. No guarantee about the time I would continue doing that though.

Getting It out of the System...

Those of you who know me enough would know that I'm prone to severe mood swings. You would have experienced them sometime or the other. But the mood I am in today is something I am experiencing for the first time. I am feeling guilty, calm, angry, anxious, upset and a bit shocked, but I am also feeling like making up with some long lost friends. I called a few friends up and said sorry and all, but they all felt that I am a bit down. I scored 88% in my board exams and frankly, I'm not satisfied. I know that I am capable of something far better than that, I tried so hard, in the last few months. For a guy like me to almost study like a nerd, is a big achievement, and somehow I feel the result would have been the same if I would not have studied at all. You guyz keep telling me that it's a good score, but who'd be convinced? I needed to do better if I had to escape the CA trap that had been laid down for me. Now it seems, there is no escape.

PS:-Errmm just to get the feelings out.I don't expect the post to make sense :)

The First Hand Experience!

Let me tell you guys, that before writing this blog, I sat in front of the screen, staring blankly at it for 10 minutes, because I had completely forgotten what I wanted to pen down. But anyway, it's been long since I have paid a visit to my blog, and I don't think it missed my pathetic articles very much. Please, also bear with me my non existent readers, as I am writing after a long time, the post will be awful.

Well let's begin then. I was traveling to my institute this morning, I was late, so I jumped the last red light, and surprise surprise, some 'mamus' were waiting for me at the other end of the road. The two of them spread out their arms on the narrow road, and well it was too late to take a U-turn. He took out my keys, ad asked me to park the bike on the side. He asked for my RC, I had none. He asked for my license, I am under-aged. He asked me why I was not wearing the helmet, "errmm", I replied. Why did I jump the red light? Ditto answer. I knew I was ducked now. So humiliating, all the girls going to the institute were giggling, some guys even stopped to inquire. I had jumped many red lights before, I never do wear a helmet. I don't even have a learner's license. I had come close to being caught before, but I had always evaded them. So many mixed emotions were brewing inside me, the great legend of Kunwar Khurana, who had never been caught, was coming to an end! I could not take it. Just as I thought all hope was lost, and reached for my mobile to call home because they were about to keep my vehicle for under-age driving, I felt something extremely divine in my pockets. The moment was a moment of enlightenment, of providential knowledge! A hundred rupee note! I was being rescued by GOD himself. I took out that almighty weapon and flashed it to the traffic cop. He eyed me as if I was demented. "Court aana hai kya?", he asked me indifferently. But I knew only too well. The battle between the immortal legend and the cop was already decided. "Jama karni hai to karlo sir, lekin uska koi faida to hai nahi aapko. Dekh lo, aapki marzi." I dealt him the final blow. He handed me the keys and left me poorer. I didn't mind though. With moral values like mine, I didn't mind a little bribing to save myself. I reached the institute within time. "Chor diya Thulle ne?", a girl asked me. I stylishly pulled out another hundred rupee note from my capris, put it back, gave her an all knowing look, went back and sat with my friends, grinning. The illusioned mind telling me stories about the girl being impressed.