Saturday, June 20, 2009

Top 10 Reasons/Events my childhood was hilariously loserish...

1)Till age 12, I was so tiny that I had to literally climb on to the backseat of a two-wheeler.

2)I loved eating Mango duet, just coz I thought it was Mango 'Dude' and not Mango duet.

3)On my very first day training at Hari Nagar Sports Complex, my balls got busted two times and I did not even know what an L-guard was, forget wearing it.

4)On the very same day, in an attempt to make a catch look dramatic, I dived for it and rolled a couple of times. When I got up I was on the other side of the boundary rope.

5)I used to play games like KhoKho, Langdi Tang, Kabaddi during my summer holidays with girls, their aunties and a couple of guyz, who are popularly established as gays today. Thankfully, I was rescued by cricket in time, to have that company any effect on me.

6)Since my childhood, I have this really huge phobia of only one thing, Lizzards. Although the fear has subsided over the years, I jumped like a clown yesterday when a lizzard passed over my foot.

7)While practice one day, I bumped my knee into this sharp stone that was lying on the field. It was a pretty serious injury which resulted in nine stitches and a loose plaster. When I was being carried home, I was crying not because it hurt too much, but coz I was thinking what possible explanation will I give to my father?

8)Jugal Hansraj, used to be my favourite actor. WHY GOD WHYY?


9)I believed my Pop could do magic. Everynight after dinner, he took out a Frooti out of the Refrigerator, spoke some Magic words and whoosh it was in his hands. When he was out of stock, he just said that it was the day for devils and he was forbidden to do magic.

10)I had some strange impression that my father worked for the CID. And my friends blindly believed that shit. In 3rd standard, I asked him about it and to his wide displeasure, was disappointed to know that he just run a finance company.

Tuesday, June 9, 2009

The Different Sentiments...

1)I am not amused, I am sitting in the institute and Dhruv, after provoking me and receiving a rather insulting reply, has reverted to high degree profanities for me. His female friends are all ears for it, and I'm staring and smiling at Rahul. I'm rather helpless, coz every inch of my body is itching to get up and punch him hard, what I usually do, but I don't want my promise to my mother to be shortlived. I don't care for the Teacher much. I do not want to fuel a fight by speaking up, but Dhruv is already telling me that he'd teach me some lesson during the recess. Rahul tells him to stop or he'll be stretched out at the back of his car when the class ends. He has stopped and I'm to concentrate on the board.

2)I am rather surprised, but not pleasantly. I was conversing with my cousin, 3 years younger than me and was commenting on the group of girls she hung out with. I had heard a lot of tasteless murmur about those girls and I tried to warn my Aunt as I did not want her to fall in the same category. The conversation suddenly shifted to my class 12th board marks and she, obviously irritated, told me that the aggregate I had secured did not have great value and I'd hardly be able to get admission in a good DU college. If I say that I'm not shocked and sad, then I'd be lying. The girl had always respected me and she had made an attempt to speak it in such a way, that would insult and upset me. Well kids do grow up enough to shoot back at you someday. It was my turn to speak and I first made a very sarcastic and rude remark that nobody among her paternal or maternal relatives would ever have managed to boast of such a percentage (Obviously I made it sound really insulting in Hindi.) Then I asked her if her percentage bordered more on the thirties or the forties last semester. Then I slammed the door and walked out of the house, My Aunt calling after me all the while...

3)I am shivering in the heat, I just avoided an accident man....The signals were all screwed, from Rajouri to Tilak Ngr metro station, showing the red and blinking green and yellow signals at the same time. The traffic had gone haywire. I was taking a left turn when a car rushed by at high speed just in front of me and I had to hit the brakes hard. I avoided accident with the car but I heard a screeching sound and looked left and saw a blueline coming at some speed 10 mtrs away. Paralysed I just kept looking, not able to do anything but that. I wasn't even wearing a helmet. The blueline stopped about a feet away from me. It took my heart 10 seconds to start beating again. It would sound corny but it was the nearest death experience I'd had.
I raced the bike and drove away....This incident really did scare the shit out of me. I vow to wear a helmet from now onwards. No guarantee about the time I would continue doing that though.